"This is a travesty, particularly after all I have done for your career Len! Rather than honour me with a substantial exhibition you have created a kindergarden display of my work. I am so embarrassed that I have decided not to attend the 'private view' and am taking the next plane back to the Vatican City as soon as I can find one. I do not want to see you again, you fraud!" From Elvis Picasso.

"I'm going with him. Sorry luv." From Your Mum.

"I would have cut off my ear for you Lenny. So I'm going too." From Elvis Van Gogh.

"The show I am curating for 'Elvis Picasso' at the 'Musee d'Art Moderne de la Ville de Nulle Part' should be much better than this rubbish." From Mary Ether, Head Curator for the Concile de l'Artes de la Ville de Nulle Part.